spank
Slap your MacBook, it yells back.
"this is the most amazing thing i've ever seen" — @kenwheeler
"I just ran sexy mode with my wife sitting next to me...We died laughing" — @duncanthedev
"peak engineering" — @tylertaewook
Uses the Apple Silicon accelerometer (Bosch BMI286 IMU via IOKit HID) to detect physical hits on your laptop and plays audio responses. Single binary, no dependencies.
Requirements
- macOS on Apple Silicon (M2+)
sudo(for IOKit HID accelerometer access)
Install
Download from the latest release.
Or build from source:
go install github.com/taigrr/spank@latest
Usage
# Normal mode — says "ow!" when slapped
sudo spank
# Sexy mode — escalating responses based on slap frequency
sudo spank --sexy
# Halo mode — plays Halo death sounds when slapped
sudo spank --halo
Modes
Pain mode (default): Randomly plays from 10 pain/protest audio clips when a slap is detected.
Sexy mode (--sexy): Tracks slaps within a rolling 5-minute window. The more you slap, the more intense the audio response. 60 levels of escalation.
Halo mode (--halo): Randomly plays from death sound effects from the Halo video game series when a slap is detected.
How it works
- Reads raw accelerometer data directly via IOKit HID (Apple SPU sensor)
- Runs vibration detection (STA/LTA, CUSUM, kurtosis, peak/MAD)
- When a significant impact is detected, plays an embedded MP3 response
- 500ms cooldown between responses to prevent rapid-fire
Credits
Sensor reading and vibration detection ported from olvvier/apple-silicon-accelerometer.
License
MIT